Self Doubt

The fourth widow inboxed me this morning asking for advice on moving out of her current home. She downsized after her husband died. She’s contemplating another move. I guess the fact that I have sold two homes and purchased two in three years has made me the go-to for “widow wheel-estate questions” 😂

Did I make money? On paper, yes, ma’am, I sure did! In the end, though, I lost money. I had to pay commissions, the movers, storage fees, and the dreaded capital gains taxes. They were the real winners. But for what I paid for the homes and what I sold them for, I won the market and I’m very thankful for God’s graciousness on my naivety. Here’s the thing, I’d do it again in a New York skinny minute. Let me back up, though—I did not, just on a whim, throw caution to the wind and move. I prayed earnestly about every decision I’ve made. So, having clarified that point, back to the skinny.

Henry has nothing to do with the story I just thought you’d like some Christmas cheer

When we let one ounce of the world in, we begin to self-doubt. That’s when I become like a yo-yo going back & forth, wondering if I made proficient decisions. That’s when I can’t make up my mind. That’s when I become indecisive. That is when my adult children stop answering their phones, and I know my answers are in the Word, not in their words.

2020 has been an extraordinary time to hear the voice of God. There hasn’t been but two sides of extraneous noise, and I think that’s where the enemy unknowingly gave us a gift. The division of left or right in this country has left a perfect space for God to sit right in the middle.

”If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all liberally and without reproach, and it will be given to him. But let him ask in faith, with no doubting, for he who doubts is like a wave of the sea driven and tossed by the wind.”-james 1:5-6.  

The two who like it when I rely on my bible and not them for answers 🥰

Author: This Grace Filled Space

Wife to my college sweet heart for over 27 years, mother of two grown daughters, Eastern North Carolinian by marriage, learning to walk by faith as a widow post ALS with a Golden Retriever named Henry in a metropolitan world.

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